At Least He Won't Go Blind

OTTAWA–A provocative movie about the sex lives of young people is too hot for some Conservatives to handle – and a parliamentary staffer has been fired for ordering tickets to a special screening.

Word is, all staff exposure to issues re sexuality will be funneled exclusively through sanctioned Conservative Party sources, which is to say Maxine Bernier's new duties will now include teaching Tory MPs and aides about the dangerous world that lies beneath a woman's petticoats. No word on whether he will demonstrate "The Venus Butterfly".





Bernier Explains His
Technique