Saturday, September 22, 2007

Bourque Fails Abjectly

Conservative news aggregater and part-time race-car driver Pierre Bourque has had one top ten finish this season, but he has spent most of his races watching faster cars lap him or, on one occasion, cuddled up with the crash fence.

However, Bourque's performance at the Sunoco 150 in Dover, Delaware, reached new heights of futility this week when his No #3 Impremedia/Full Metal Minerals Chevrolet was stamped with the big "DNQ"--did not qualify--and he passed the afternoon in the stands, eating corn dogs.

Go Pierre!

4 comments:

Ti-Guy said...

You know, we really have to re-think this whole "universal literacy" thing. Some people shouldn't be taught to read and write, and should simply be encouraged to do what they do best; like driving around in circles, for example.

Anonymous said...

I thought Bourque was a Liberal? Did he not run for some sort of seat at one time as a Lib?

As for not qualifing, such is the sport of auto racing. It is ultra competitive and extremely difficult. I say Bourque is doing what he loves and power to him. At least he is somewhat exciting, unlike you bus riders without jobs that have nothing better to do than piss on a guys dream.

I bet you GTA metrosexuals don't even have drivers licences.

Ti-Guy said...

Yes, we do...and we look fabulous in our photos to boot.

Anonymous said...

As someone who is acquainted with Bourque, I can assert that he is pathetic in many things, and that excludes car racing...
Furthermore, he is stupid, ignorant and an asshole.
His latest failure demonstrates that there is some justice in the universe.