Monday, June 26, 2006

Scenes From the Life of BigCityLib: a Digital Tone Poem

Okay, so I've got the digital camera going and figured out how to download photos from the camera to the PC. I thought I would play around with it and try to work a few shots into my latest post.

Sorry, no nudy pics for the time being, even though I have recently discovered that, on this blog, nudy pics are apparently "what the people want". Who knew that the readers of BigCityLib Strikes Back were the most Unruly, Insensitive variety of Liberal going? The party must truly be doomed if our kind is allowed to hold sway over it.

In any case, here are the results of half a weekend of wandering around with a new digicam. As you can clearly see, having a nice camera does not make you a Photographer:



This is one of the many bars where BigCityLib goes to do his thinking. Unfortunately, I cannot reveal the name of the bar, or photograph any of my "friends", who frequent the bar. They are the kind of men who cannot have their faces show up on film, if you get what I'm saying; it might mean another trip back to Mexico for them, and hiding out in some bug-infested cave in a mountain-side for a week until everything blows over.

Let's just say that when, like BigCityLib, you deal in a contraband substance, like The Truth, it is sometimes necessary to deal in other contraband substances, even more Illegal than The Truth. They're how you finance The Truth, see?

Which reminds me: I hope Pedro scrounges up that hash he says he can get his hands on. I'm going out West on vacation in two weeks, and the whole concept of finding enough vasoline that I can grease-up a half-ounce bag of weed (which you can always get in good old TO, thank God) and jam it up my ass before the flight is getting kind of old. Last time I tried something like that, I risked 15 to 20 years hard time for a bag of sub-standard, stinky home-grown that turned out to be primarily stalk. Everybody in Tuscon had a good laugh at my expense, and wouldn't smoke the stuff anyway, after they found out how it had "arrived" in town.

All I want this time is a little cube of black, something that I can stick in the toe of my sneaker. Otherwise I might have to holiday au naturelle, which would suck.

....

On an entirely different subject, and as you probably noticed from earlier posts, BigCityLib is an animal lover, except that BigCityLib loves the kind of animals that most people recoil from. Garbage eaters, to be precise: Raccoons, Rats, Seagulls, Pigeons, Coyotes, Foxes. Anything that can set up shop next to city full of humans, and get by on their leavings. Those animals are what I call a bunch of tough mothers!

Here is a picture of me and some of my homeys in the parking lot outside a Loblaws:

Now, another reason I admire the Seagull and The Rat and the Raven is that, let's face it, after Global Warming kicks in, these are the sort of animals that will be our competition. On the other hand, Dolphins, those cute little Bush-Babys, Koala Bears...they're all pretty much going to be fucked! In the future, your kids will be eating the flesh of giant cockroaches, and being hunted by giant, radioactive, talking rats!

Go see Al Gore's new movie if you don't believe me!

So my theory is, you might as well try and get on their good side before The Final Confrontation, know what I mean? In case we lose and become their slaves.

SALUTE YOUR NEW MASTERS, FOOLISH HUMAN!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Big City Yawn

Anonymous said...

You have the meanest trolls. If they're Iggy fans, then that's just one more reason not to support the Respected Human Rights Professor.

bigcitylib said...

Ah, but Ti-guy, if it wasn't for trolls, nobody would read this blog. I live for every insult.

Anonymous said...

ok then. . .

your photography sucks way worse than your political beliefs . . and that's some fukin bad bottom of the skank barrel.