Because its been a childhood dream of mine, and the folks at Hotlix candy have designed an attractive line of insect toffees. My immediate inspiration is this guy, and I have chosen a scorpion because a) they are distantly related to lobsters and I'm hoping the taste will be similar and, b) an old white guy behind the counter of a junk jewellery store in Yuma, Ariz. once told me that "candied scorpion" was considered a delicacy by the local Cocopah Indians.
So, without further ado:
8:58 AM, First Impressions: The candy itself is hard and quite sickeningly sweet. Maybe not such a great idea for breakfast. As for the scorpion, it doesn't taste much like lobster. Not much like chicken either. Very crunchy, however. Very, very crunchy.
Stomach is holding up pretty well.
9:05 AM, Second Impressions: Brushed my teeth to get the candy flavor out of my mouth. Didn't work. Checked between teeth for insect parts. Found something that looked like an eye-stalk, removed.
So far so good, although stomach is now casting me threatening glances.
9:15 AM: Okay, the rest of the bug has been flushed and is now heading down the pipes to Lake Ontario. I think I might have to go lay on my side for a bit. Bad idea all around.
This might be all I manage to write today.
Stupid Cocopah Indians.